Access To A Whole New World

There are even times when you’ll learn that their negative cue had nothing to do with you and was caused by something else that’s bothering them. You’ll get a much better response if you’re indirect and gentle about it. It might stem from something that they’re unsure of or hesitant about, and all they needed was a little reassurance from you again. You may have forgotten to respond to an email that they needed, and they can’t focus on what you’re saying right now because they still need that information pronto! When you uncover this, you can apologize and respond right away. In this case, not only is it valuable to know your relationship with them hasn’t been compromised, but you’re also now in a position to offer a supportive pair of active listening ears. Before going too deep on reading nonverbal cues, make sure you’ve spent enough time working on your active listening skills. Once you’re confident in your active listening skills and are noticing considerable improvements in your interactions, move on to reading nonverbal cues. Remember, nonverbal cues provide the most valuable insight when observed throughout the course of an entire conversation. Seeing a single cue one time doesn’t mean you know someone’s thoughts or feelings with 100% certainty. The key here is to look for repeated cues and patterns. As you progress, add mirroring those nonverbal cues to your communication repertoire. You’ll have access to a whole new world of unspoken information and relationship building, and you will be at a tremendous advantage in every situation.

Look At You Now

Let’s jump into more oral communication strategies. You learned about matching your conversation partner’s body position, posture, and gestures. Now, we’ll take mirroring a step further and explore the impact of verbal mirroring. Verbal mirroring is when you speak in a way that closely matches your conversation partner’s vocal tone, volume, and speed. People feel drawn to voices similar to theirs, which makes mirroring useful to increase engagement. Many top professionals use both verbal and nonverbal mirroring to rapidly increase the level of connection during their interactions, allowing them to build stronger relationships and gain influence quickly. Now, the idea isn’t to obsess over copying a person’s voice. You want to model their communication style while maintaining your individuality and authenticity. Mirroring doesn’t have to be extreme to the point of sounding unnatural. While you don’t have to worry about flawlessly matching the other person’s speed and volume, you do want to become more aligned with the way they’re speaking. Simply slowing down your speech and lowering your voice will help you build a connection. Likewise, if you’re talking with your Vice President first thing in the morning, and it seems like they just excitedly pounded three cups of coffee, it’s probably not the time for long, dramatic pauses.

No Expectations

Instead, do your best to match their energy, tone, speed, and volume. Again, don’t worry about pushing yourself too hard to the point of sounding unnatural. Right now, your goal is to simply narrow the vocal gap between you and the person you’re speaking with as much as possible, which will go a long way in helping you build rapport with everyone. When you have better relationships with everyone in your professional life, your workdays become easier and more enjoyable, you get more respect from others, and you’ll be in a position for your career to advance at an elevated rate. Use a voice recorder app on your cell phone to record yourself in different work situations and see how your voice changes. Most of the time, we have no idea we are doing things that put us at a disadvantage until we take the time to analyze ourselves. Now, the next time that executive speaks to you, you know to focus on maintaining your usual volume and keeping your voice strong. Once you start making mirroring a regular practice, use these recordings to see how natural your voice sounds while mirroring others. This is a great way to track your progress as your skills improve each week. When the telephone was invented in 1876, the way humans communicated soared to a whole new level. Today, the ability to make successful calls is an essential skill if you want to advance your career as fast as possible. Some people are complete naturals on the phone.

Show Me A Smile

The phone rings, and they transform into Leonardo DiCaprio in the Wolf of Wall Street when he’s hammering out sales in the early scenes. Others aren’t quite as gifted, and some of us are utterly terrified at the thought of using the phone. I made the switch from staring at the phone to staring at the wall until it was time to go home for the whole day. If you have several points to discuss and you want to make sure you hit all of them, make a quick bulleted list as an outline for your call. Now, establish the goal of the call. Is it gathering or giving information, making arrangements, introducing your product or service, getting feedback, obtaining approval, or something else? It will be much easier for you to stay focused if you go in with a clear purpose. This makes for a more efficient and effective conversation, which your conversation partner will appreciate. We’re all busy, so the last thing you want is to make the person on the other line think you’re unorganized or that you don’t respect their time. Almost as if you’ve known them for years? Something about having nothing to do with communication skills. Another comment from the editor that was initially hurtful but relatively accurate. So, what’s a more relevant reason for this connection? It’s a biological response that is the result of oxytocin. The body releases this hormone when we’re with someone we feel connected to. We produce oxytocin in various ways, including physical touch and eye contact. Neither of those is possible over the phone, making it challenging to achieve the same level of connection on a call.