I Often Felt Alone

If we can help young children understand their capacity to create anything they want, and make that concept applicable to all areas of their life, we are creating a generation of successful individuals. I often felt alone and isolated in a battle that I was definitely felt I was losing . We were new in our neighborhood when our struggles became more apparent and out of hand. I felt I didn’t have that tribe to raise my child, with no mother or sister near for guidance and support, or a good friend who could understand and offer a word of comfort at that moment when I felt so lost. My search for new ideas and solutions. I never lost my hope, despite the situation and the struggle. In our search for help we visited different therapists. Our interactions would improve momentarily and then collapse again, and I decided to educate myself. I learned about myself and the changes I needed to make to become a more influential mother to my children. The sad reality is that often home is where we are loved the most but still act the worse. There was so much contention in our home, that the most basic interaction could be dominated by explosions of arguments. Any attempt to bring a good spirit was unsuccessful.

In The Back Of My Mind

I often would ask myself When will I ever learn a new way to handle this? I feared for my two younger children, who were witnessing their older sibling breaking the rules and disregarding any concern from us as parents. I was so desperate for answers, I prayed for peace, and mostly to have my kind and the sweet boy back. When I was alone, I would cry just from thinking of him and his struggle. One day I walked into my closet sobbing uncontrollably when I felt an excruciating pain as if a hole has torn through my heart. He was his father, and I had tried everything I could to help him. I was immediately overcome with peace, and the pain decreased in scale as I was calming. I felt my love for his son and me. I knew that, more than anyone, understood us and knew our suffering. Our home was not a sanctuary of peace, and that fact was a sign of many other bad things that could have gone wrong if we had not fixed our situation. In my search for answers and guidance, I learned so much about myself, and that our reactions to situations are in significant part tied to behaviors we learned growing up and also to our personality types. I was trying to raise my family following a new set of beliefs and expectations, but my reaction to challenging situations took me back to my own ways. Growing up I only saw my mother making decisions and giving instructions, while some of her children followed and obeyed.

The Adventure of A Lifetime

From the beginning of our family interactions I had remained as the disciplinary parent to our son, as I had been as a single parent. That also became a pattern with the rest of our children. Our interactions became a model for teaching our children by example that adults also obey and surrender. Understanding our different roles as parents as well the forms of delivery are fundamental in keeping harmony and opening bridges of communication in our families. If only I had understood that the role of teaching as a parent should always be preceded with demonstrations of love and concern, instead of long lectures and lessons of disapproval. If I had realized that his mind and heart was probably much more fragile than those of other boys because of our journey, I could have replaced those teaching moments with more hugs and hopes, so that love would allow my son to soften his heart to learning and understanding. If only I had understood that my relationship with him was the foundation of my influence on him. If only I had understood that free agency allows natural learning from our own mistakes. But how could I ever know! If it were not for this, my first time failing as a mother, I would not have learned all that I now know. Still to this day, when my memories take me back to those moments of struggle, full of anger, frustration and despair, I feel pain over that power struggle we both lost. In my attempt to break his will I broke mine too. I did then what I knew how to do.

Beyond The Blue

Now that I know better, I do better. Maya Angelou. Now when I lovingly correct my daughters and I am even able to kiss and hug them tight after a disagreement, I know because of my experiences they would be able to be great mothers to their children, and that the cycle of control and use of force as a form of obedience was ended. As my children have their own children, I hope my experiences can spare them some dreadful and unnecessary moments. Failure is an important part of our eternal progress. Through her own trials Iraima discovered the healing effect of visual art. Later she learned how powerful and effective this tool can be when used as an instrument in helping children develop and grow. The creation of Hands on Art blossomed from her vison and passion in assisting others find their purpose. Fulfilling potential is what this studio located in Utah is all about. In the studio an atmosphere has been cultivated that is safe, dynamic, and inspiring. It’s a place where children and adults are provided with the tools to explore art fully through various medium forms. Iraima puts great focus and care in helping children, creating an art program that empowers children to tap into their Inner Creator. They see themselves as powerful individuals who can accomplish anything. A zeal for learning and remaining competitive in the marketing industry as a graphic designer led her to the United States.