Listen To Your Thoughts

How many times have you told yourself how bad or unworthy you are until you believed it and made it your truth? I am the one who loves life just like he did. He had a big voice, and he told me when I was little that the truth would set me free. I belong just like Dad did. Her representative moved closer to the family group. I asked about her career, and she started to laugh even as she was crying. I’m a public speaker! she said. My niche is speaking up for those who have no voice. I am a spokeswoman for several large public causes, and I am known for calling out hidden truths and deliberate silences as I see them. The entire room erupted. I didn’t realize that the biggest lies were the ones I was telling myself. I have never not belonged. The silence in my family gave me a purpose.

Keep The Faith

Now I can use it differently. She was quiet for a moment, then added, It’s so strange, I’ve been wanting to shift for a while. See how Hannah is coaching herself forward? Recognizing and speaking and assimilating the new truths she was seeing? At that point, Hannah put her hand over her heart and stood deep in thought for a bit. Her father’s and mother’s representatives moved behind her and placed their hands on her back, and that made her stand up straight. She lifted her head, grinned, and said, I want to teach people to use their own voices. I want to teach others to speak out when it’s necessary with eloquence . Not long after that constellation, Hannah began to teach a series called Next Door Strategies, eventually becoming a much beloved coach, speaker, and mentor to top executives. As angry and jarring and initially reluctant to engage as she was, Hannah came in with an agenda to shift. Even though she couldn’t face the group at first, she still wanted to work. She admitted in the beginning to feeling a cross between excitement and nervousness. Her emotions wanted to shift into elevated emotions, and she was intrigued by a sense of new possibility. That got her into the constellation, at which point she lowered her defenses and committed to the process.

Boost Up The Confidence

She moved out of her headspace and old patterns and allowed herself to see what was in front of her with fresh eyes. She didn’t balk or refuse to look. Throughout the constellation, she stayed engaged and invested in allowing for a completion and a shift. When I do a constellation, I look for a physical, visceral shift in a client, which Hannah exhibited as new insights unfolded. She later reported that she could feel her body relaxing and releasing old patterns that had kept her tight and angry. At that point, her body became her friend, working with her brain to rewire old, limiting patterns even as the constellation was progressing. The new insights unfolded, she let them in, naming them and owning them. Right there she was rewiring her thoughts and feelings, activating new neural networks, telling herself new truths, and reaching new, nurturing conclusions. She committed to belonging and saw the importance of using a softer, more elevated set of emotions. She embraced her new vision of herself and her new purpose in life and, after the constellation work, immediately set about applying her new knowledge in her life and work. If she could do it, so can you! You know what your issue is. Write it down on a piece of paper and put the paper at one end of a room on the floor.

Some Good Things Never Last

Write them down on a new piece of paper and place it at the opposite end of the room where you can move around it. Notice what you think and how you feel around those dreams and wants. Do you feel different over here as opposed to standing next to your issue? Can you name the new feeling? Can you allow for its possibility without censoring or negating it? Try it on like a new outfit. Feel your way into this. Part of the pivot is being open to something different, so allow for that new possibility to emerge into your world. Then look across at the pattern trying to emerge. Slowly move toward the pattern trying to emerge. Listen to your thoughts. Feel the feelings that stir in you. Notice where they are in your body. Notice your actions and reactions. Do you move across swiftly? If a sentence pops up, write it down and place it in front of you. Does it become a limiter or an enabler of movement? If you find yourself reversing or moving sideways, explore that. Is there something you need to complete? As you are moving forward, notice if you need a resource or support. Did you just have the thought that Uncle Jimmy would be a great person to help you promote the business you’re dreaming about and walking toward? Write his name down and put it on the floor where you’re standing. See if it makes a difference. If it helps, hold onto it. If it doesn’t, place it to one side. It may be needed later, or it may contain an old thought that needs to be resolved. Keep moving and adding resources and ideas as they come up, adjusting language, thoughts, and actions as you move. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a step or two back until you settle down again. This is not your failure. Notice what is stopping you and where that sits in your body, and complete that. Once you are able to move, take the next step. In fact, that may well be a new step for you. Be patient and kind to myself. Write it down and put it on the floor next to you. You may have to tell yourself a new thought, practice, or feeling a number of times.